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Holden joins forces with Star Wars

Australia's own teams up with Disney ahead of blockbuster release

Holden and Star Wars team up
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Holden has teamed up with Disney ahead of the release of the new Star Wars: The Force Awakens movie, due for release this November.

Apparently, Holden will "have a number of innovative and engaging activations coming to Australia and New Zealand and our customer should be prepared to expect the unexpected."

On the back of this announcement MOTOR can exclusively reveal 10 ways this new tie-up will change Holden's future operations.

  • The Millenium Falcon will be renamed the Millenium Commodore
  • In an unusual move, each new model will be a little bit worse than the one preceding it, however it won’t be enough to stop the new car selling in huge numbers
  • The hero colour for VF II will change from Hothouse Green to Yoda Green
  • Head-up displays will disappear, with drivers now expected to use the Force
  • Holden Chairman Mark Bernhard will henceforth only answer to ‘Emperor Bernhard’
  • Jar Jar Binks will be the public face of Holden’s MY2016 marketing campaign
  • Holden’s Port Melbourne offices will be sold, with staff relocating to a large, moon-shaped HQ located approximately 36,000km from Earth’s surface
  • The lion on Holden’s badge will be replaced by the face of Chewbacca
  • With active safety gear inspired by Stormtrooper technology, Holden vehicles will now be the safest on the road, incapable of actually hitting anything they’re aiming at
  • All sat-nav instructions will be delivered by Darth Vader (this is actually a thing!)

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Scott Newman
Contributor

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